My Beautiful Zahra

I’ve fallen in love.

Head over heels, it’s true.

I’ve fallen in love,

But sadly, it’s not with you.

I don’t mean to sound callous,

Or insensitive or rough,

But maybe it’s unavoidable,

This subject’s a bit tough.

I’ve fallen in love with the world,

Nothing specific per se,

But just the world in general,

And the magic it holds each day.

There are so many things to laugh about,

So many places to explore.

How could you ever blame me for wanting to see more?

I want to soak in the sights,

Smell the subtle perfumes that linger in spring,

I want to hear the harmonies of a thousand languages,

I want to feel everything. 

You may dream about the future,

You may dream of what may be,

You may dream of love, laughter and smiles,

As far as the eye can see.

You may dream of your career,

As you climb your way to the top,

But be wary of what you wish for,

And to know when to stop.

This doesn’t mean lose hope,

Or faith or plans or dreams,

But simply to remember:

Not everything is what it seems.

To see through the layers,

To see what future is for you,

You must know what you want,

And know yourself through and through.

Don’t give time to insecurities,

And don’t fall prey to disbelief,

There’s no use lingering on these unwanted thoughts,

They will only give you grief.

So, hold your head high wherever you wander,

And never give in to despair.

Because if you don’t know where you’re going,

Any road will get you there. 

Love poems seem so cheesy,

How do I write one anyway?

And if I did,

Would it make any difference

To your average day?

Would that day to you

Be just the same?

Will I get my heart broken,

with only myself to blame?

But the distance between us is growing,

And I hate it with all my heart,

Is it too cheesy to say that

It pains me when we’re apart?

I think of you so often,

Do you even know,

Just how much you mean to me

And just how far I’d go

To be with you again,

To be in your arms one last time.

Even if it means writing this poem,

(and even making it rhyme!)

But our hearts are young,

They have so much to learn.

So i hope they continue to

when you return. 

The ability to smile

When thing are tough,

The ability to smile,

When you’ve had enough.

The ability to smile 

When things don’t go your way,

The ability to smile 

When you have a bad day.

The ability to smile

When there’s too much on your plate.

The ability to smile

When you’re running late.

The ability to smile

When you’re feeling down

The ability to smile

Instead of frown.

This is the lesson we all need to learn.

Jealousy is not something that 

Usually fits into my day.

At the slightest hint of it,

I kick it away.

But what would happen, 

If given the space,

For the jealousy to grow,

But in the wrong place?

Why now would this feeling

Come on so strong?

When I specifically told myself

I was feeling neutral all along.

When we’re together,

We’re friends, you see,

Because I denied the potential

Of what could be.

And now that we’re both stuck 

In this mutual ‘friend zone’,

I’m suddenly not so fond

Of being all on my own.

When we’re together,

We laugh and we talk,

Even though every second

I’m watching like a hawk

For that hint of jealousy,

That confuses me to no end. 

What am I meant to feel

When you’re my friend?

What crosses the line

Between jealousy and caring?

And just how many of these emotions

Should I be sharing?

Why do we only write about the things we know?

How limited is that?

But also logical, because how could we write about the unknown?

How do you describe what you don’t know?

Words, sentences, and poetry just won’t cut it this time.

Maybe i’ve gone round the bend,

But it strikes me as funny when people say

“We are limited only by our imagination.”

I don’t want to be limited by anything.

Let alone myself!

I want to better myself,

Go one step further:

I want to step outside my imagination.

What an amazing world that would be,

If we could break through the limitation,

Of our own imagination.

Instead of ‘thinking outside the box’

(What a horribly angular thing)

I want to ‘think outside my imagination’.

What unknown wonders lie there?

What colours we have no name for?

What shapes have more dimensions than we know?

What beauty we have no words for?

What perfection eludes us?

What world awaits?

Imagine that.

If you can.

This thing called life,

I love it,

It’s great!

Even if you’ve got exams,

or your running late.

Will it really matter in a day or two?

or three or four?

or maybe more?

Anyway…

Eventually you’ll realise

that the things that got to you before,

Just don’t matter anymore!

For all the little things:

Don’t get in a huff!

And always remember

To not sweat the small stuff! 

This is not my first time ‘round,

nor is it my last.

and as i try to keep my feet so firmly on the ground,

I try not forget my past.

Because the present is built on the past,

along with the future too,

because if you don’t know who you were

and who you are…

how do you know how to be, you?

This tricky little concept of

me, myself and I,

it flips my mind inside out,

and is nothing shy

of leaving me feeling insane,

with a blob of jelly

 instead of my brain.

I can hold my head,

or shake it from side to side,

but that doesn’t seem to help

sort out the perplexity inside.

It drives my crazy,

‘bonkers’ you could say.

And what immense control it takes

 to go through just one day.

But despite the enigma in my head

I keep my smile firmly on my face.

And passing that on to other people

is the only thing that keeps me happy

and in my place.

I didn’t want to be that person,

I didn’t want to be so scared,

I didn’t want to break what

we had

we have

we shared.

To be that person hurt me,

maybe even more than it hurt you.

But remember the days we spent together,

and how we grew

into the people we are today.

Too individual,

too strong,

too different to get along.

Ends of the scale we were,

oh, how opposites attract!

So we talked,

we thought,

we shared,

but turned a blind eye to the fact

that the differences we stood for,

could have no common end.

Which brings me to the point where

you’ll have to be my friend.